Editor

The Washington Times

Washington, DC

Dear Sir:

I am announcing that I will be throwing my hat in the ring in the 2012 presidential race.

What is my experience in politics, you ask?  I have listened to worthless politicians all my life.  That’s my experience.  I will not be making basketball picks nor playing basketball or golf.  As president, I will work six days a week, taking off on Sundays to attend the Holy Sacrifice of the Mass with my wife.  I will take off Christmas, Good Friday through Easter, the 4th of July, and Thanksgiving.  I will accept no pay.  I will sign whatever I have to sign to begin drilling for oil and gas again in all 50 (not 57) states.  My Attorney General will not be sending any little Cuban boys, who have escaped the oppression of communism, back to Cuba.  He will be adhering to Federal Judges on rulings on the resumption of off shore drilling and the unconstitutionality of the socialistic health care plan.  Foreign aid will come to an end, with the exceptions of South Korea, Taiwan, and Israel.  Europe and the rest of the world will have to defend themselves or pay the price of non-vigilance.  Some of the savings could be used to send anyone who hates this country to the country of his choice, understanding that he will never be allowed to return.  The entire United States-Mexican border would be closed.  I must hate Mexicans?  No, I’m ¼ Mexican.  I would not take any military questions from “journalists” unless they had served this in the military.  I’m proud to say that I have a birth certificate, and having served our Republic in the United States Marine Corps, I already know how to pronounce corps!

There you have it; hat in the ring.

Sincerely

Kenneth Paynter

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